


oh, loverboy, what're you doin' tonight?

by enbyflorenzi



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Childhood Memories, Dean Winchester Needs a Hug, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Queen (Band) References, Supportive Castiel (Supernatural)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-25 12:14:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30088926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enbyflorenzi/pseuds/enbyflorenzi
Summary: all dean wanted was to forget about his first case, keep his brother safe, and earn castiel's love.
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester
Kudos: 4





	oh, loverboy, what're you doin' tonight?

— Because the best thing you could have done was to turn your back and walk away!

Dean wasn't sure how the fight had started, nor was he sure when the bitter words had slipped out of his mouth without warning. Sam's face contorted in confusion even though he had a brief notion of what he was talking about. 

Castiel's warm fingers intertwined with his as he silently stood up and pulled the angel along, who before leaving looked at Sam with a "take care, okay?" look, earning a smile in response. Finally they crossed the hall in quick steps, taking a deep breath only when the bedroom door closed and Castiel's hands touched Dean's face, checking that everything was okay. 

— Dean, you need to take a deep breath right now. I'm afraid you're going to have another panic attack.   
— Cas, I'm fine. 

The angel's eyes rolled back at the lack of honesty. He hadn't been fine for a few years now. Seconds of silence were broken by an almost whisper.

— I was twelve years old when I participated in John's first case. He was a ghost kid who had gotten lost in a forest and I made a mistake.   
— What happened?   
— Sam was small so we didn't have much to talk about, I couldn't be honest with him and tell him how bad our father was. So I was stupid to make friends with a ghost just because he was a child who had also lost his family. John was so angry that I thought that at any moment he would leave me to die in those woods too, but he did worse. I had to kill the ghost. 

Castiel always thought that his heart couldn't be broken any more for Dean, but he was wrong. His heart had broken into a million pieces when the choked voice sounded and the tears flowed freely, wetting Dean's face, who tried-an extremely failed attempt at hiding his red face. 

— Dean, look at me, please. You had to grow up too fast and it wasn't fair, and maybe there's not much fair in this world, but you need to listen to me for one minute. What happened and the circumstances or the motives of your stupid little brainless father were not your fault.   
— But-  
— Nothing that happened was your fault, you were just a kid. 

The tears continued to fall, but nothing separated them from the warm and comfortable embrace that remained for minutes. Dean's ragged breathing echoed painfully as he tried to push the negative thoughts away. Stupid and useless son of a bitch.

He vaguely heard Castil's voice, but couldn't understand what he was talking about. The hug was interrupted by the angel's footsteps that led him straight to the bed, sitting him down almost quickly and lifting his boyfriend's trembling hand to rest on his jacket-covered heart. Beating against Dean's hand, Castiel could see him slowly start to pay attention to the angel's quiet beats, trying to match.

**Oh, let me feel your heartbeat.**   
**Oh, can you feel my love heat?**   
**Come on and sit on my hot-seat of love.**   
**And tell me how do you feel right after all.**

Castiel wasn't sure that the only music he remembered, which Dean had put on the mixtape made especially for his boyfriend, would calm him down, but he was clearly mistaken when the red green eyes focused on the angel's voice, listening to it. Their foreheads were pressed against each other, sharing the same space.

**Oh, love. Oh, lover boy.**   
**What're you doin' tonight, hey, boy?**

— Geez. Baby, what was that?   
— I suppose it's a good song, isn't it? It was written on the back of the tape.   
— You're damn right. Actually I've never heard you sing like that before.   
— Just for you.   
— Yeah right, let's go to bed, Mr. lover boy.

**When I'm not with you**   
**Think of me always**   
**Love you, love you.**


End file.
